The Rugby World Cup finalists have been decided. So, who's going to win the cup: South Africa, or England?

Download Episode 38 - Semi-Final review | Final preview

Subscribe to the Dropkicks Podcast (iTunes users click here).

<<< Caution Spoilers >>>

 

Ah crap I missed the kickoff

What an amazing bounce of the ball! England up by five. Josh Lewsey had lots of momentum and crashes over Traille (pronounced "Try" apparently)

Oh no! Lewsey pats Traille on the head and taunts him as he gets up. Did he learn nothing from O'Driscoll v Argentina?

"What a stadium, what an occasion" is what Hamish McKay decides we need to know about the game instead of actual commentary.

I discover that "squeeze ball" is an actual term in rugby.

It seems that despite the IRB saying that forward passes can't be called by touch judges, that is exactly what has just happened.

Referee Kaplan just told Andy Sheridan "you're not even trying [in the scrum]" I feel a wee bit sorry for him. I also feel sorry for Matt Dunning who Hamish McKay calls "Po-po". I'm sure official commentators shouldn't be calling the players names. (We're unofficial and can do what we want)

There are numerous French fans in the crowd wearing chickens on their heads. That, is the sign of a real fan.

Jason Robinson does some amazing Harlem Globetrotter-style work to keep the ball in touch and touch judge gets it wrong and ruins the mood.

Johnny Wilkinson just spat on his own arm! This used to be a game of gentlemen. He's got a OBE for fuck's sake.

Chabal comes on to a big roar from the crowd. Having watched him a few more times since they played in NZ I'm holding off on calling him "great" or even "good" just yet.

Y'know for a game with only one point in it, there's not a lot of tension.

Chabal has been eyegouged by his teammate! The dirty French.

Meanwhile a massive tackle from Clerc smashes Lewsey*(?) into touch.
*All those blonde whitey's look the same to me.

I am getting the sneaky suspiscion that the French #5 is actually Ali Williams with a moustache. And you know Williams didn't come back with the rest of the team.

half time

And we're back, surprisingly neither team opted to score during the ten minutes that the opposition wasn't on the field.

Here we are 20mins into the second half and the first piece of excitement. Jason Robinson wants to end his career as one of the greatest English rugby players. And I might just believe him.

At this point in the game I'm still unsure who I want to win. I think it's still France. But everytime England dedfend inside their 22 from a good French kick-through, I start (internally) cheering for England.

Harinordoquy comes on in order to annoy reporters who have to spell his name. Interestingly he's wearing one bright green glove.

Some wonderful play by France. The type that we are used to seeing from them (crazy flair play) but that we haven't much of today. Then they lose it in the end.

I'm actually thinking, at this point, that England might win. But what I don't understand is why they are kicking away possession when they're a point down with ten minutes left.

Paul Honiss takes out the English halfback Gomarsall with a brilliant shoulder.

One of the trainers is reaching around Johnny Wilkinson and has got his hands down Wilkinson's pants. Very erotic.

Johnny has just kicked a penalty. So it seems I was right. My partner, who has just joined me, believes it's because she is watching.

Chabal gives away a penalty (elbow to the facial area). I wonder if he wil be wearing a funny wig at the end of this game.

At some point Kaplan becomes a German. "Zee Ball iz OWT!" "Advantage iz OVA!"

Wow after heaps of French pressure, the English come away with the win. Sackey and Clerc hug, smile and motion that they'll swap jerseys later. England is a team who people thought would leave in the pool stages (which would've been the worst exit by a defending champ ever) but instead they are now going to be playing in the final. Chabal is shown crying in slow motion. Mike Catt (Man of the Match) is being interviewed and is genuinely surprised by the victory.

Well good on them, so much for the symmetry of an Argentine-France final. Stats and some analysis will be along on Monday.

 

England 14 - France 9 

­

Who will win? Well there will be no “Lock of the Week” this week.

England v France

Of all the countries England has gone to war with (which as it turns out includes nearly every country at this World Cup) France would be the one who they really went to war with. It’s a rivalry like Fraser and Ali. The Dust-up in Denis, The Showdown in the Stade.

England have shown true grit and determination in getting to this point but will it be enough to counter a resurgent French who don’t want to be shown up on their home turf?

The French are known for throwing big games in World Cups. They’ve been to the final twice on the back of upsets and lost their nerve twice. England might be able to use this to their advantage.

Then again France hasn’t lost to England in a loooong time.

It’s almost too close to call but I give the edge to France for their titanic effort last weekend.

South Africa v Argentina

South Africa have become the tournament favourites but we all saw what little that means. They also carry with them the pride of the Tri-Nations teams. With out a South African win, we’ll be forced to listen to the continued bleating of Mr S Jones of Wales.

Argentina, however, are not exactly going to be pushovers. Their record against the Springboks is 0-11, but that is an old stat. And South Africa haven’t faced the Pumas since 2005 when:

the Springboks returned to Argentina in November, they faced a much stronger Pumas side, with most of their European-based players present. The Pumas took a 20-16 lead into the half-time break at Vélez Sársfield. While they faded in the second half, they were not embarrassed, losing 34-23.

So facing a team that has beaten Scotland, Wales, Irleand, France, England, and the B&I Lions since 2005 can South Africa afford to follow the same “no respect” line they did against Fiji, just because “they’ve never lost to them before”?

Nope. My pick is Argentina by a margin of seven.

The draw for the imminently pending Rugby World Cup is very interesting beyond the pool play. If everything goes to plan in the pools (and it might not, Pool D is far from certain) we could have the following situation in the knock out stages:

• QF1 - Australia wins Pool B and meets England in Marseille
• QF2 - New Zealand top Pool C and face Ireland in Cardiff
• QF3 - South Africa prevails over England to top Pool A and play Wales in Marseille (Note: there is no way Wales could play the quarterfinal in Cardiff)
• QF4 - France wins Pool D and faces Scotland in Saint Denis

These quarterfinals may have been certainties in past years but are very much up in the air at the moment.

• Pool A: South Africa is looking good but maybe England will beat them. Has Samoa finally got the edge on England?
• Pool B: Will Wales be able to hold off Fiji, Japan and Canada?
• Pool C: Can Italy beat Scotland and vice versa.
• Pool D: France, Ireland and Argentina – which top-ten nation is going home disappointed?

But let’s say for argument that the quarterfinals listed above actually take place, then, if everything goes as it should:

• SF1 - Australia scrape a victory out in one 2003 rematch only to face another in the All Blacks (a result that causes every rugby fan in NZ to start praying).
• SF2 – South Africa ease past Wales and meet and equally cruising France.

Semifinal #2 is very interesting as France and South Africa are the two teams other than the All Blacks that have been seen as possible winners of the Cup.

This is as far as our crystal ball can see at the moment (despite everything Fishboy claims to know). But we can say that some big name teams will taking early flights home (bags stuffed full of duty-free booze).